Sept 21/12 Though i’m looking at this as a sort of calendar for the next year, i look backwards also for reference and inspiration, digging through old sketches and peering at previous work, wondering why i forgot this stitch or that, why i swept aside a particular idea, an image or clue to what i’m doing. A calendar marks the days ahead, but is a record of the gone also. We plan for the future with one foot on the ground and the other trying to find the first ladder step up to the sky, the step off the cliff to breathless expectation, hope that we will fly rather than fall, or simply anticipating another solid space to keep going. Inspiration from older work can be surprising.
And now here it is, April 5th of 2015….the last time i touched it was April 1st last year—Fool’s Day indeed.
Did i put this aside from lack of interest, laziness or a dull sense of how much time would be invested, possibly “wasted”? Is it too big? Where did the intent go? Is it just going to be a big area of stitching that really says nothing? Was i overly ambitious with the concept? Is the size the thing?
What if i cut it up? It can always go back together. The very nature of stitching is to mend, alter, fit back together.
I feel i am disappearing. I need to start again to wave, not drown.